Re: Screaming!!

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Posted By Kelly on December 23, 2000 at 23:14:08:

In Reply to: Screaming!! posted by Lisa Maeorg on December 21, 2000 at 17:22:08:

Hi Lisa!

What a great post - I loved the story on the visit from "the authorities". It's nice when it works. :-)

We have a similar situation with the yelling and screaming. Ben is currently on a kick where a lot of his sentences start with "I HATE" and then something kind of bizarre, like "when my pants get wet", or "purple things", or "Buzz and Zurg THINK THINK THINK". Really, the kid is nutty. But it wasn't so long ago that we could barely hear him talk, esp. when we wanted him to be able to tell someone something, or to get another child's attention. So this is progress. Speaking audibly while looking at someone's face has been a goal for him at school these last 2 years, and it is really starting to become a reality for him - he's doing great with it.

I love the idea of this being like learning a new instrument - good one - makes sense! What I've done from time to time is to go ahead and join him for a brief time, raising my voice to his level and really getting into his whole mood (angry, defiant, tantrumming, attention getting, whatever) and really having fun with it. After only a short while I might say how my throat (or my ear) is hurting from all the noise I'm making, or how silly it is for us to be yelling when we're so close and a simple whisper will do, and then modelling a more appropriate pitch. We usually move onto something else pretty quickly after that, and it seems to work quite well. My joining seems to catch him off guard and really gets his attention.

In the restaurants, I simply say to him as many times as he raises his voice "Ben, we're in a restaurant. You can't yell like that in a restaurant. Please talk in a quieter voice, like this." No button pushing, pretty boring, he gets the point.

So go do some yelling - please let us know how it goes!!

Love from Kelly.

Follow Ups

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Subject: Re: Re: Screaming!!

Comments:: Hi Lisa! : What a great post - I loved the story on the visit from "the authorities". It's nice when it works. :-) : We have a similar situation with the yelling and screaming. Ben is currently on a kick where a lot of his sentences start with "I HATE" and then something kind of bizarre, like "when my pants get wet", or "purple things", or "Buzz and Zurg THINK THINK THINK". Really, the kid is nutty. But it wasn't so long ago that we could barely hear him talk, esp. when we wanted him to be able to tell someone something, or to get another child's attention. So this is progress. Speaking audibly while looking at someone's face has been a goal for him at school these last 2 years, and it is really starting to become a reality for him - he's doing great with it. : I love the idea of this being like learning a new instrument - good one - makes sense! What I've done from time to time is to go ahead and join him for a brief time, raising my voice to his level and really getting into his whole mood (angry, defiant, tantrumming, attention getting, whatever) and really having fun with it. After only a short while I might say how my throat (or my ear) is hurting from all the noise I'm making, or how silly it is for us to be yelling when we're so close and a simple whisper will do, and then modelling a more appropriate pitch. We usually move onto something else pretty quickly after that, and it seems to work quite well. My joining seems to catch him off guard and really gets his attention. : In the restaurants, I simply say to him as many times as he raises his voice "Ben, we're in a restaurant. You can't yell like that in a restaurant. Please talk in a quieter voice, like this." No button pushing, pretty boring, he gets the point. : So go do some yelling - please let us know how it goes!! : Love from Kelly.