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Posted By A Son-Rise Message Board Participant on February 19, 2000 at 14:30:42:
i will be interested to see how others respond to your message.
john has such great volunteers at this stage of our program. something i was thinking about while reading your post was a outreach we had in october. watching some of our volunteers, and myself, i was feeling like we were going to be "eaten alive" by the person doing our outreach. instead i was absolutely amazed at all the good and unique qualities the person found in each of our volunteers and how much they brought to our program. different ways were brought up on how to handle situations, and for me that seemed to open up alot of possibilities.
john was non-verbal in the english language when we started and now is talking in sentences, 4-12 words, and asking questions. some of our volunteers now, didn't know john when he was non-verbal, and even myself, sometimes start to take for granted that he is speaking. i was just speaking with this with one of my volunteers yesterday. at times like this, it is good for me to check in with myself and the others, maybe some gentle reminders. i have been fortunate that everyone has been receptive and open to suggestions. i also really try to open the door to discussion, i want everyone to know that their thoughts and ideas are very important to this program. sometimes things happen that i don't always agree with, than i am certain to check in and find out why it happened. what i have found is that there are different ways that will work just as nicely and alot of times i end up trying them myself
one thing i have noticed in our program is that we have some very "calm and easy-going" personalities. these people encourage john very effectively. one gal is so "calm", she is amazing, another is the "face gal" guaranteed to always give john rewards of her eyes or wonderful expressions
i always try to check in, make sure if people are comfortable. if they tell me they are, than i have to take that for what it is, instead of possibly assuming that they are not comfortable or loving the room. i am lucky though, when a situation arrives, i think everyone is comfortable in expressing this.
have you thought of giving video feedbacks to these people in the room and really pointing out situations that you want them to observe? possibly a group meeting to go over areas of concern, encouraging everyone to get involved with ideas, than see what the outcome is? maybe back to having them watch others in the room, or yourself giving them some effective ideas to bring back in the room. maybe roleplaying between yourself and the volunteer, practising exciting ways to respond to your child but also listening to see what their input and thoughts are.
i guess my thinking is more geared towards how can you help your volunteer and keep them, than letting them know in a loving way, that they are not what your child needs at this time. so the only thing i can suggest if you have decided in your heart that this is not for them, is to become most comfortable with your decision, and speak at them honestly, letting them know how much you appreciate their help, but at this time, you are going to have to make this decision.
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