Autism Treatment Center of America Forum

[AnnieH]

Greetings,
I am very new to this whole world, and have a few questions that maybe someone can help me find answers for. We have a 4.5 yo boy who has not been diagnosed but several practitioners have suspected (as do we) that he is on the spectrum. However, you wouldn't necessarily know this when you first meet him. He's in preschool. He can be interactive and even charming. He doesn't do typical 'isms.' His biggest challenges, and our biggest concerns, involve feeling empathy, forming close bonds, and experiencing his emotions. He doesn't let in our love very easily, never says "I love you," recoils from kisses, doesn't show spontaneous affection, gets overwhelmed by strong feelings, and truly does not seem to get the concept of other people having feelings that need to be respected. This, despite a very nurturing and loving home environment (and no TV). He has hit and shoved classmates repeatedly the last 3 years. He doesn't seem to "hear" that when he's hurting someone he needs to stop. He gets easily "triggered" and becomes rigid and disconnected. In that state, there really is nothing we can do to reach him. He was evaluated by the ESD and qualifies for special ed based on PDD in the social/emotional realms so he's had someone in his preschool classroom once a week this year helping him work with the kids. He's made great progress, but he's still at the point where I need to watch him constantly when he's around other kids (or our cat) to keep them safe. My question: could the Son-Rise program be useful in our situation? How would we ever get him to stay in a playroom when he's been out and about in the world for 3 years? He loves to play outside, running around and digging in the dirt--how could we confine him to a playroom? Would we really be able to help him with empathy and emotional connections? We've spoken with a counselor at the Option institute and they want us to come to the June training. We live in OR and we could swing it but it would certainly be a HUGE investment of time, energy and money for us to do this. I guess there are just so many avenues to pursue and I want to have some confidence that this one would really pay off before I jump in. Are there families who have been in our shoes we could speak with? Can anyone give me some feedback on my questions?

[BeckyDamgaard]

Hello,

Thank you so much for reaching out to us! It sounds like you are doing a wonderful job evaluating your son and trying to help him. Also "no TV", that's wonderful!

In The Son-Rise Program we first work on building a deep rapport and relationship with our children as a way to show them predictability in a world that is out of control. It sounds like your son could actually be hitting, etc as a way to communicate that he needs control. Perhaps something happens in those moments that he doesn't want and it's challenging for him to express himself so hitting is a quick way to get things moving.

We absolutely believe it's possible for him to be in The Son-Rise Program Playroom. There are playrooms all over the world as we speak with children of all ages and all over the Autism Spectrum who are enjoying their time in their special room. It's just about you seeing the value in that environment. The playroom environment is one with no distractions and will give your son a large amount of control, which will be extremely supportive and nurturing for him. This will help him to gain predictability and trust people more easily. Once he is exposed to this environment on a regular basis, he will start to connect on a deeper level and open up to us more allowing us to then help him with the challenges he has.

We very much encourage you to come to our Start-Up Program this year!

Warm regards,