Autism Treatment Center of America Forum

[Lisa Monaghan]

We have not yet started our son on a gluten/casein free diet, we are trying to take one step at a time now our priority is just getting a good group together to work with our son, and getting in the time ourselves. I know it is common for children on the spectrum to not realize they are full after eatting but my son seems to want to constantly eat he requests his favorite food all the time and is starting to get a weight problem. As all of his requests are now being made with two words strung together (a new accomplishment) for him we are celebrating like crazy however it seems wrong to celebrate then refuse his request. I am perplexed about what to do. I want to do the gluten/ casein free diet but as I am now still training most of my team, feel it is too challenging to do all at once. I have written this as if there is more than one family member helping with this programme but I regret to say I am the only parent who is taking part in this programme presently as my husband still hasn't gotten onboard.

[BeckyDamgaard]

Dear Lisa,

I am a Son-Rise Program Teacher and would love to help.

It sounds like your son is doing so wonderfully and responding nicely to all of the work you have put in to helping him. It's exciting to hear about his language development, and how you are taking it one step at a time to get your team in place. Step by step is definitely the way to do it!

When we use the Son-Rise Program with our children, we do indeed give them control as much as possible and try to limit the word "No" wherever we can in the playroom environment. However, when it comes to health and safety issues, we also need to set some boundaries.

In these circumstances, allow yourself to set a boundary on the amount of food he eats and stop feeding him once he has had a healthy portion for his height and weight. What's really going to be important as you support your son through this time is his health. If you are allowing him to over eat then he may have more challenges to deal with in the future.

I suggest that you decide how much food is a healthy portion for his snack or meal and then once he has finished his portion for the day/snack/meal and once he has eaten his allowance, there is no more food for the day.

Celebrating and responding to his language does not have to mean giving him what he wants all the time. Here are some techniques that you can use as you help him through this boundary.

1) Come from a place of love - explain to your son that you love him very much and want to help him and that you will only give him so much food and once it's gone, it's gone.

2) Celebrate him anyway! If he is asking for more food, let him know how amazing you think he is for telling you (e.g. "Thank you for asking for more snack....I love to hear your voice").

3) Offer an alternative, if he persists in asking for the food, offer to draw it for him or pretend to eat it. Perhaps you could sing about it, or make a list of all the things that he is asking for.

4) Know that he might cry, whine, throw himself on the ground, shout or persist in asking for what he wants. This will be a time when you can remain calm, loving and easy with him, knowing he is doing the best he can to get what he wants and still remaining strong in the boundary you have set.

I am excited for you!

Warm regards,

Becky