he shuts down himself after toileting?!

he shuts down himself after toileting?!

Postby esen » Mon Oct 01, 2012 2:16 pm

I have a 4year old son, Mesud who has high functioning autism. He made great progress with son rise program but we still have old and new problems. My son is fully potty-trained but when he is done with his bussiness on toilet, instead of taking the toilet paper and wiping himself, he just shuts down himself. He doesn't respond his name, or look at us. He just sits there up to 35min and do not take further action. I started to use visual timer for extra two mins after I anticipate that he is done, but I am not sure it is the correct approach. Could you give a suggestion?
Thank you,
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Re: he shuts down himself after toileting?!

Postby BeckyDamgaard » Wed Oct 03, 2012 11:25 am

Hello Esen,

It's great to hear from you! We are thrilled that you have been able to use The Son-Rise Program to help Mesud!

It sounds like when he is sitting on the toilet, he is isming (stimming), meaning that he is dis-connected from you, doing something exclusive and repetitious so this would be a time to join him. I suggest that you sweetly explain that you are going to help him wipe his bottom, then once you have done that, move away and sit somewhere else in the room and do what he does until he gives you a green light (eye contact or language). When he does this, strongly invite him to pull up his pants, wash his hands, come back in the playroom, etc.

At times we experience our children using the bathroom or sitting on the toilet as a way to gain control and get their own personal space. So you can investigate if there is a way that perhaps he is trying to ism elsewhere and he is not being joined or given that control and predictability. If you find places that he needs to be joined, you may see that he no longer needs to "escape" to the bathroom.

We wish you all the best!
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