Thank you for your question. This is not uncommon for our children who are finding their way when using the toilet. It is wonderful that he is taking himself to the bathroom and it sounds as if he has found his own unique way of getting everything the way he wants it in order to relax into using the toilet. Our children seek a great deal of control and especially exercise their desire to do this when they are using the bathroom.
We can help you even more if you let me know at what point you view this as a problem. For instance; does he resist getting dressed after he uses the bathroom, does he take his clothes off solely in the bathroom or before he enters a restroom (no matter where it is)?
For now try the following:
Be easy when your son does this, by being calm and not giving big reactions when he takes his clothes off. If you are viewing it as a problem then you may express it to him that it is a problem.
Remember to give big reactions in the form of celebration when your son is doing something in an area you want him to grow in. Cheer him for using the bathroom and taking good care of himself. Give a cheer whenever he attempts to or actually dresses himself.
Model to him and explain how he can use the toilet and still keep his clothes on. Meaning you would actually show him how it is done by doing this in front of him (understanding you are his Mum you could use a male figure in his life).
Explain to him why it is useful to keep your clothes on. When explaining anything to your son, talk to him as you would to any neurotypical 10 year old. We believe our children are very smart and absolutely understand our explanations. Of course, you can come up with your own explanations but remember to not use negative judgements. Here are some explanations you could try out. “I don’t get completely undressed when I use the bathroom because then I get to spend more time playing instead of getting dressed.” “I keep some of my clothes on when I sit on the toilet so that I can stay warm.”
When your son is in the process of getting dressed encourage him to do as much on his own (e.g. pulling his trousers up, putting his T-Shirt on). This is when you would cheer him for taking care of himself and getting dressed like the amazing growing boy he is!
Have fun trying out these techniques and teaching your boy how to master more independence when taking care of himself. Please let us know how things go and if you need any further guidance.
Warmest wishes to you and your family,
Susan